When they write your life history many people will not accept that you had no choice, in not choosing, to create a life you wanted to live.
Back when I owned my train station home at the edge of the Rocky Mountains in Montana, there were several times that childhood friends, from a local ranching family, came up for an overnight when they were back home visiting. They would have a large family gathering for dinner and then the two daughters and their families would spend the night. It was an evening filled with laughter, wine, great conversation and ended with the teenagers in sleeping bags on the deck, facing out at the vast array of stars.
At one of these gatherings, I walked into my living room and found two of the cousins in deep conversation. They were in their sixties and rarely saw each other.
One cousin had been valedictorian of his high school class and received a full ride scholarship to college. I am not sure if he finished because his dad demanded that he come home and work on the ranch. He stayed on after his dad died, dated but never married, and many people would say that he never had a life because his mother and siblings expected him to keep the ranch going. They were a frugal family, and so to the rest of us it looked like a life of all work. He was a very nice guy and well liked in the community.
The other cousin graduated from high school and headed out of state to a modeling school, which was quickly followed by marriage. Eventually this led to a move to California, and what the rest of us perceived as a glamorous lifestyle. She would wear her mink coat when back home for visits. She ended up getting divorced, eventually lost her home and in her fifties, with the help of her younger sister and brother-in-law, ended up in the Midwest living in an apartment and working a day shift in a bakery.
When I came into the living room, they were commiserating with each other, saying if they could live their lives over again they would definitely do it differently. I could hear no plans, from either of them, to take responsibility for their lives from this point forward.
Their interaction reminded me of the life-changing importance of acting on one’s insights. I had witnessed time and again how valuable a sudden insight can actively push us into action to recreate our life, no matter our age or present situation. Taking responsibility is a 100% inside job.
In my private coaching sessions, I hold clients accountable by having them write down their insights. Out of this insight list comes numerous ways to take action to embrace their life.
By asking yourself how you want to be remembered, the insightful you may be highly surprised by what comes up from the whisper inside!
By Erec Lindberg
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